(Spoiler alert. If you didn’t see the season finale, numbers 3 and 2 are not for you!)
I love the show, but quite honestly, I actually don’t LIKE many of the characters. I think Daryl would be the only character I’d shed a tear for. Of all the characters left to us, though the one I most want to see made into pate’ for Zombies is Lori. Here are my top ten reasons to slice and dice her:
10. First thing she did was play the damsel in distress and jump into bed with the Alpha male for protection. Loser.
9. Speaking of protection, she obviously wasn’t using any.
8. If Andrea’s a good shot, she SHOULD be defending the camp and not made to feel guilty about not doing the dishes. What century is this again?
7. If you’re going to go to all the trouble of secretly getting abortion pills, you DON’T leave them out on the table for your husband to find! Not too bright.
6. There are zombies out there for crissake! What kind of mother loses track of her kid EVERY DAY during a zombie apocalypse? She’s not even drunk or playing bingo.
5. Rick asked her opinion THREE TIMES on what to do with that kid in the barn. Her reaction “whatever you think is best honey!” (MAJOR EYE ROLLING going on here now.)
4. She’s a terrible cook. Did you see that chicken she brought up to Beth? Ew. Poor girl would rather die than eat Lori’s cooking.
3. She’s a horrible shot. I don’t think she got a single zombie in that herd, and they were so thick you could have hit them with a carny rifle. (You know, the kind at the midway used to shoot little red stars out of paper? They’re so off you couldn’t hit Godzilla with one of those.)
2. “Kill Shane, Rick! He’s dangerous, Rick! “ “EW! You killed Shane Rick! You repulse me, Rick!” She’s mental!
1. She’s too skinny. She’s half zombified already.
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